Looking forward to a new beginning..

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Everything has to come to an end.
Peoples' lives end, and so do relationships. This is a fact that should be accepted by everyone. I can also tell that accepting this fact is a "must" so as not to bother anyone or hurt your very own self. When a person's life ends; all of his friends and relatives shed tears, but later on gets on with their lives. Likewise, when a relationship ends, both parties need to face the truth that it has already ended. They should keep moving forward, let go of the past and look for a better future and reality.

The first step for Moving On is ACCEPTANCE; and then everything else will follow.

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A relationship is like riding a bus, no matter how you enjoy your long travel, time will come that you need to get off that bus; and eventually, walk, or ride another vehicle. You never stop moving towards somewhere.
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( Guhhhhhhh. It’s a lame comparison. Haha. I know, I know. There should be a better comparison than the bus. )

Random causes of depression.

It's so depressing when you want to write but your hands wont move; it makes all those ideas jammed up in your mind, and soon enough you're going to forget them all.


It is depressing to wake up seeing darkness and nobody to greet you a "good morning", as you stand up.


How depressing is it to see the dark skies and the falling rain as you open the window of your room when you are all alone? -- It is so depressing to find nobody to comfort you in the middle of that long, cold day.


It is so depressing to have your mind cluttered with a vast number of information yet along that knowledge you have you still cannot find what you are seeking of for maybe, just maybe, you are not destined to know that thing.


It’s too depressing to hear people say that if a thing is not meant for you, you won’t have it when you know that people are the ones who make their own destiny.


How depressing could it be to find the reason for your existence but you can not even have your shadow touch it?

It is depressing when you have yourself confused over something which should not be confusing you at all.

Depressing it is also, to find yourself brooding over a problem that you can not solve for the solution it requires is just unimaginable.

But isn’t it more depressing to find yourself problematic with a problem you cannot identify?


The things that are really depressing are when you want to cry but your tears won’t fall… and when you want to speak of something but you just can’t tell of it for you having the idea that a bad thing might happen if you let that out of your mind.


My… how depressing is it to see all of these depressing stuffs? It’s so depressing I want to lock myself up in my room for a whole year but finding it impossible because that can’t just be done.

LU! Live 09: My Sem Starter

LU! Live is an annual event held at World Trade Center Manila and is hosted by LU! Company. It's an event where players of all the game franchises owned by LU! get together, manage booths, and sell merchandises such as pins, shirts, tumblers, jackets, dolls, charms, keychains, game-based headgears, lanyards, and many more. Film Fest, Photography contests, raffles, and in-game tourneys are also held.

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[ right - Me; left - a guildmate ]
This is a photo of a friend and I, wearing our guild jackets that we just got yesterday. Thanks to Ate Camz for taking time to manage those jackets!



[ in the photo: Coerce Guild Jacket, Coerce Pin, Imbalance Pin, RO Shirt, High Wizard Pin, and RO Chibi-designed lanyard (from Revamped_Blasphemy Guild of Valhalla), LU! Live pass, Gamer Sim, and RO Load P50 ]
These are the few stuffs I got from the event. Supposedly, a guild tag is included here but unfortunately, I wasn't able to get mine yesterday due to some problems encountered by the persons who offered us that product. Boohoo. Thanks to Elvin_Neal aka Dexter64 http://dexter64-jinchuurikinotes.blogspot.com/ for the lanyard. And kudos to the persons responsible for the super cute chibi art.



[ in the photo: World Famous McDonald's French Fries LOL ]
Just before riding the bus heading to my place, my friend and I ate at McDonald's. I can't seem to reject his offer of treating me there. Thanks to that friend. You know who you are and what you did. Thanks a bunch. Really. D<

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Thanks to my parents who allowed me to travel alone to Manila. To Marlon who waited for me at our meeting place so I won't get lost. Jehz for accompanying me, and for pointing out good-looking guys LOL. Master Dex, for the lanyard. Coerce guildmates and friends, especially those who got busy with the booth and stuffs. To the new people I met yesterday. And to the random American Girl who introduced herself to me as a "random person that I don't know". I had fun at LU! Live even though my legs almost killed me.

Until next year (if ever there's still another LU! event)
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On the other hand, sem. break ends now and my second semester for my first year in college starts tomorrow. I will have my first class tomorrow at 1:00PM - 4:00PM (Physics Laboratory). Urk. So I'mma bid goodbye to this lame-O blog of mine for a while. I'll be back on Friday. Do pray for me, ne? >D<

My lonesome 17th birthday celebration

Last November 3, I celebrated my birthday alone... Well I was alone almost the whole day. Otosan and Okasan left early for grandpa's funeral while Oniichan left me at around noon to meet with his girlfriend. Boohoo. So I was all alone with the computer, television, DVD player, my cellphone, and the microphone.

Oniichan went home with his girlfriend and brought with them baked macaroni. Of course I cannot let that cheesy baked mac uneaten so I ate it. Lol. Then I realized that the weather was too hot so I asked Oniichan to buy us ice cream. *Looks at teh delicious ice cream's picture above*

After eating, I was again left home alone. While I was using the computer, it suddenly went off. And I was like "Uh-oh, I can smell something burning." :D Guess what burned? It was the power supply's fuse! Since then I really got doomed. I sat on our sofa for about 15minutes and sent text messages to my friends.

*thinks*
*thinks*
*thinks*

I was thinking like I was sitting on the thinking chair. LOL. And then I saw the DVD player and the microphone.

"Finally! I have something to do." I said to myself. So I set everything up. Turned on the television, plugged the microphone, placed the CD inside the player, and picked songs that I felt like singing. Later, Through the years, When I Dream, were some of the songs that I sang. Well I didn't really sing my heart out; I was not really in the mood for singing that time.

Hours passed...

Finally, Otosan and Okasan got back from grandpa's burial. They bought me the socks that I asked them to buy (I was planning to wear those on Saturday at LU Live). I'm planning to attend the convention in a school girl outfit. LOL.

They (Otosan and Okasan) left me alone again for their weekly Bible Study. I was alone again, watching crappy teleseries because I had no other thing to do. Boohoo.

That's my birthday celebration for this year. I won't let my next birthday be like this! Keeeeeeeeeh!

First Post.

I know; I know... The title is lame.
This post serves as an introduction about me and my randomness.
Basically, any information in this post is based on how I know myself – a personal perspective bases.

Athalia… is not my real name. It’s the name which I wished to be my real name. Athalia served as my screen name for like more than 3 years already. I got it from the Bible. I’m 16 (as of now) and will be turning 17 in three days; and turning 18 in 367 days.

I'm a pretty strong-willed person so when I feel like being lazy, I give it 100% laziness. I am sometimes eccentric. There are also times when I withdraw myself from society (I actually do this most of the time) - I think I can stay put inside our house for a whole year provided that my parents won't force me to go out and meet Mr. Sun ~Oh hello there!, and the flowers.

As my blogger name says, I’m an “iska” (students from the school I attend to are referred to as scholars) and I wish I never became one; I’m “tamad” or lazy. Boohoo. I’m just so honest about that (my being lazy) fact.

I'm in to arts - music, visuals. I sing (and I can sing well if I want to lol), I can draw (and charcoal paint if I want to lol again). When I want to do something, I can really be good at it but most of the times my laziness eats up my spirit so I end up being not so good. Hah. Lol.

Some random facts...
When I was a kid, I always wished to grow older but now that I became an adult, I wish I could turn back time and remain as a kid forever.

Reasons?
The reasons behind that are simple. Kids are the luckiest persons in this world; they don't have a lot of things to think of, their satisfaction can be attained easily, their lives are much less complicated than that of an adult's.

Right now I want to go on a journey of finding the reason for my existence. :/ I wish someone would pop out of nowhere and help me.

A pretty screwed up life

Currently, my life's pretty damned. I just had my heart broken after a very long time. I thought this feeling was good for being hurt is part of being human but then do I really need to hurt this bad? God, it hurts so bad that I cry myself to sleep every night since that happened.

Screwed.
Why does that person have to do stuffs for me when he was the one who .. ugh. never mind.

Messed.
Everything in my mind seems to be in a clutter. I want to quit studying in my current school for two reasons:
1. I can’t seem to find my raison d'être; and
2. Someone there is kind of tormenting me,
but that's the only university in the Philippines which offers my course. And I kind of appreciated my course already so there... Another thing, I think my parents won't allow me to temporarily stop going to school. But if I were to be the one in control, I would really want to take a break from all of these craps.

Aside from having a pretty screwed up life, I'm now having a pretty ironic day. Today is supposedly a day of happiness but it turned out as an unhappy day.

This is the worst.
Worst birthday ever. Some days before this very day, something really saddening happened. Aside from that, a grandpa of mine died (overseas) and his body arrived in the Philippines last Sunday, November 1; He will be buried later which imposes that my parents would leave me home alone on this day. And yesterday, November 2, my cousin (a 5 year-old boy) was rush to the hospital due to vomiting (but thank God, he's now fine).

Birthday wishes?
I wish my mind would be cleared. I want a worry-free mind. I wish my heart would get mend. I want a heart that is fixed and not broken. I wish to have a peaceful life. I want to live my everyday with no regrets.

Happy birthday, dearest self! (Urk. It sounds pathetic.) LOL.